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Mr./Ms. Cerebellum,
I am appalled that you would think that it is not proper for one to revel in his or her own dreams.� If my desire is found in my dream state, why couldn't I enjoy that?� Why would that be a bad thing? �
I'm sure this poor 'steve' character does not deserve your e-abuse, and I will never visit your site again! :[ �
Good Day Mam/Sir, �
Concerned reader.
Generally, in any given situation, I'm the one who causes everyone else to be uncomfortable. Today, at lunch, I was trumped by one of my officemates.
He told us about his dreams. Good lord.
The second dream had him careening wildly about in a child-molester style van with Kid Rock in the back. His lack of dream state driving skills ended with Kid Rock being bisected in a gory accident.
This doesn't bother me so much, in fact, I can only hope that he has some sort of precognition and this dream will come true. I'll buy him a chocolate malt if it does.
The other one makes me want to invest in a cattle prod to keep him at a safe distance. In this dream he was riding in a beautiful royal carriage as part of an extravagant wedding procession. His lovely bride? None other than Alyssa Milano.
We all have dreams that we're not proud of. We all have dreams where we find ourselves in compromising situations with people we would never admit to in social situations. Steve, on the other hand, was very pleased that Alyssa wanted to join in holy matrimony with him and, subsequently (I assume) get her consumation on with him.
I work with a man who revels in his delusions on a nightly basis.
Hey, look at what I found via Mark's website!
At this moment, what is your favorite...
1. ...song?
Pearly by Radiohead
"That's where she got her sweet tooth for white boys"
2. ...food?
Right now I'm just gonna have to say bbq pork and milkshakes and puffy cheetohs.
Welcome to pms where becoming orca fat and being housebound for the rest of your life seems like a viable option.
3. ...tv show?
hmmm...I'm one of those assholes that doesn't watch tv, but not for moral reasons or anything. I just don't watch it because if I did i would watch too much and never get anything else done. When I did watch tv, it was mostly nature shows. I'm a dork, what cann I say.
4. ...scent?
Sandalwood. Yum.
5. ...quote?
For such a little woman, you are so full of misery
My glasses broke while I was on vacation (more on that later). I was never particularly fond of those glasses, the bows didnt have hinges, just flexible metal. One of the bows finally snapped off. Anyway, since there were no hinges, the bows never fully opened all the way and you couldn't put them on with just one hand. This is something you don't consider until you are flying down the freeway and the sun is setting and you need to change from sunglasses to regular glasses.
The good thing about those glasses was that they were so light you barely noticed them.
So I got new glasses last night. I'm pretty apathetic about the new ones. Not particularly fond of them, really, but they work. They have hinges, which is good, but they are heavier which has been irritating all day. Also, i don't really care for how they look. But that's its own issue.
I am pretty much incapable of picking out clothes or accessories for myself. When i pick a new shirt or pants or something, people remain politely silent. When I wear something that jen picks out for me i get all kinds of random compliments. Hairstyles that I pick out are greeted with indifference at best, so now when I get my hair cut I just tell my stylist to do his magic. I trust him because it works. So I was looking at glasses last night. Everything I picked was either too expensive or deemed not right for my face.
So I have my new glasses and they work and all, they just pretty much look like my old ones, which I didn't care for.
Sigh.
I have this fun habit of never ever deleting phone numbers or email addresses, especially phone numbers in my cell phone. Any time I get someone's number I throw it in my phone book and save it. makes ofr a fun game when you look at a name and cryptic abbreviation next to it trying to figure out who it is and what the abbreviation means.
Don NV?
John C H 2???
What the hell. It's a fun game. Anyway i went to add a new number to my phone book this morning and i was out of room. Sad. I finally gave in and got rid of all the numbers i knew I would not be using any time soon or ever again. Goodbye Matt, Don, Donn, Dan, John, James, Daniel and Stella. Not only does this clear up space in my phone, but it also helps (just a little) to prevent that annoying habit I have of sending text messages to the wrong people because i can't be bothered to look closely enough at the phone before I send.
Okay, that won't actually get better. Word to the wise, if my message to you is cryptic or apropo of nothing, then it was probably not for you.
If you're bored, send an email to my phone, cornmeal@plinko.net! It'll be fun and I'll respond.
This morning I traded a cigarette for a banana. Either that's healthy or I'm preparing for a life in prison.
Sometimes my life is just too much fun. I'm sitting on the couch crocheting a baby blanket and singing along to the music.
Of course that wouldn't be weird. It's just that Jen walked in on me and said, "did you just sing along to that line?"
I looked up and told her I'd been singing along to the entire song and laughed.
The line: "I have found some kind of temporary sanity in this shit, blood and cum on my hands" from 'Prison Sex' by Tool. How many people can mindlessly sing along to Tool while crocheting? I'd bet not many.
Anyone who knows me knows I have an infinite fascination with space and all it encompasses. I love space, I read all the new studies and reports, i try to keep up on theories and whatnot.
I cried when the Columbia blew up.
Studying the universe is important. There is so much to learn, so much it can tell us. So many ways in which it will humble us. And god knows that as a species we could use some humbling right now. Hell, the study of the universe is what made me an atheist, made me realize just how insignificant our galaxy, our solar system, our planet, our species is. Everything comes and goes and does it in such a quick span of time that the universe as a whole doesn't even recognize it.
Anyway, I have a point. Bush is announcing manned missions to the moon and to Mars. Interesting, but stupid. We don't need manned missions to these places. A mission anywhere is expensive, hugely so. Every single aspect of space travel costs a lot of money, take all of the elements that cost money and add to them the cost of keeping organisms alive and comfortable and the costs skyrocket exponentially so to speak.
What more do we need to learn about the moon? What can be accomplished with manned missions that can't be accomplished with cheaper, faster, expendable probes? And Mars? Why do we need to send humans to Mars? We can't afford to send humans to Mars. The success rate for sending probes to Mars isn't exactly filling me with confidence, and we want manned missions?
This whole thing just smacks of a large pissing contest with no one. It strikes me as a desperate pre-election dicking around by a guy who couldn't find the star closest to our planet if he were sitting outside, at noon, on a cloudless day. The worst part is, people will fall for it, "Oh Bush is gonna get us on to Mars! If we don't get to Mars then the terrorists have won! The whole point of fighting terrorists was to GET TO MARS.".
Sigh, people are dumb and reactionary sometimes.
I was just reading my old posts and I keep coming across similar entries...
"I did something cool. I'll write about it later. Also post pictures."
And it's always a lie. If I don't write about something right away any attempt later just seems hollow. And I never post pics after the fact. I'm a terrible liar. You've been warned.
Also, it should be noted that I am in the smallest sized jeans that I've been in since the middle of college.
I'm not thin by any stretch of the imagination, but I'm not so bad as I was anymore, and that's a good thing.
My house is kinda big. I pretty much bought the biggest house I could afford at the time. I love my house dearly, but the house is big for two people. There were parts of my house that I would not step foot in for weeks at a time. Four bedrooms, two bathrooms, kitchen, dining room, formal living room, family room and laundry room. So many rooms.
The house is 2 floors, neatly divided. The upstairs features 3 of the bedrooms, one of the bathrooms, the kitchen, dining room and formal living room. The downstairs holds the rest. So neatly split like that. And the house is big. What to do with so much space.
Divide that motherfucker in half!
Yep, moved all my stuff out of the family room, emptied my crap out of the downstairs bedroom and cleaned everything up and looked for a renter. Since the renter would have to be allowed to use the kitchen and therefore have access to the entire house, it would have to be someone we trusted. Also, I would want someone clean, quiet and reliable. The obvious solution presented itself in the form of my sister. Clean, reliable, quiet and trustworthy. We negotiated terms and agreed on an arrangement and she's moved in.
Keen.
It's been kind of weird so far. It was important to me that we not fall into a roommate situation or have this turn into one long sleepover. When I get home from work I have the urge to run downstairs and talk with her, but I restrain myself. She needs her privacy as much as i will need my space. I also resist the urge to invite her up to watch movies with me, I have to remember that she is renting from me and not sleeping over. I'm sure this will work itself out with time. I'm just so excited to have her here.
The other thing is food. I came home the other day and saw all this keen new food in my fridge! I was so excited that Jen had picked up different stuff for me to eat!! Wrong, it was my sister's. Also, I came home to the aroma of freshly fried bacon. Sigh, she eats the things I want to eat but abstain from.
I'm really happy about this arrangement, I get to see my sister more often. It feels safer to have another person in the house. Our dad only has to make one stop now to see us and when I have parties she doesn't have to worry about how she's gonna get home!
Hooray.
I like to go outside sometimes and throw my hands in the air right over my head. Then I close my eyes and imagine that the earth is holding my feet and spinning me in a circle as it rotates.
Kinda like when you were a kid and your dad spun you around in the air until you were dizzy and sick from laughter. Wobbling around the yard you begged for more.
I still want this, but only the earth can do this for me now.
A short essay by Heather
Wednesday
Fly into Dulles, the stupidest airport ever. Ever. Take the shuttle to my hotel. The original plan was to spend some time at museums on the mall before having to get ready for the evening. But because Dulles is both stupid and far away, I didn't have time. I checked in with Mark, we firmed up our plans. It was already after 4pm and I realized that the only thing I'd had to eat was 1/2 ounce of airline pretzels and a squirt of soda. I went to Union Station search of food and a phone charger. Got back to the hotel in time to get ready and finish the book I was reading.
Mark showed up a little while later. We hung out in the room getting to know each other, then headed off at 11pm for food and countdown festivities. Afterward, he made sure I got to bed safe and sound.
Thursday
We went to breakfast, I had tasty tasty french toast. Then off to the zoo where we spent four hours looking at hippos, capybaras, naked mole rats, obscene starfish, pandas, buffalo, kids, gorillas and wolves. I even got an ice cream. One must always have an ice cream at the zoo.
I got over 100 pictures of things at the zoo.
After the zoo, Mark headed to his place to clean up and I headed to the hotel to rest a bit, then we met for dinner, tasty Indian food. Then back to Mark's place where he entertained me with GTA3 and web silliness among other things.
Friday
Mark went to work and I headed off to meet my old friend Jason for dim sum. Jason is totally silly and a lot of fun and I had missed him a lot. At one point he looked around the room and then declared himself the awesomest guy in the room. He was probably right. We hung out for a bit then i headed out to meet Doug for beers and sharks. Doug is charismatic and energetic and funny. Absolute joy to hang out with (even if he does sometimes forget that my legs are like half the length of his and I practically have to run to keep up!).
We head to one bar, but it isn't open yet, and I have to pee. He takes me to a hotel bar where I can pee and we can have a beer. Bartender starts happy hour early for us because he can see that we are both just hugely joyful to be around. Then over to the originally intended bar (the name of which escapes me) and we had more tasty beer.
The aquarium refused us entrance as it seemed that everyone in this quadrant of the galaxy had decided to go to the aquarium that day. Doug showed me around the city and impressed me with his knowledge of science fiction fantasy books. One more bar and dinner, then back to DC for more beer and fun.
We got to Brickskellers early so We hung out for a bit and waited for Mark. The three of us waited for James for a bit then went and got a table. Mark and Doug are fun on their own, but they become exponentially more amusing when they're together. Also, we checked out chicks together and that's fun. James FINALLY showed up and the party became a raucous soiree. After many beers and laughs we headed out for giant pizza and then the long trek back to find the car. Doug dropped Mark and I off and Mark made sure I was tucked in safe for the night.
Saturday
Mark and I had lunch at a place with good food but bold rats running the floor!!! I have seen so many rats on this trip. Back to the hotel for entertainment, platonic cuddling and football watching. I don't sleep very well, and I rarely sleep when out of town so by saturday I was exhausted. I had hoped to see a bunch of stuff on the mall, but I just didn't have the energy. Sushi for dinner and then up until 5am cuddling and talking.
Sunday
Mark and I just hung out and entertained ourselves a bit before he took me to the airport. The ride to the airport was sad, and it didn't help that he played the saddest music ever. Sad. He dropped me off and I cried, I always do. Flight back was uneventful and I kept dozing off.
Wish i had something more interesting to write about the trip.
I can't express enough the kindness and generosity of both Mark and Doug. they are both truly sweet, fun people to spend time with and both went out of their way to make me feel welcome.
I hate those situations where it does not matter how much effort you think you're putting forth you're still missing some vital clue and you will never get it. I mean, seriously, it's like working so hard to tend a garden that won't grow because you fail to notice how far into the desert you live.
Maybe people should be less oblique about their clues.